Stressed-Out Superwomen - A Simple Solution for Self-care and Work/Life Balance

In our win-win at all cost, extreme-makeover madness world, it seems the only message being sent today is that we must be perfect in every aspect of our lives. In addition to a stellar career, we must reside in an impressive home, drive a luxury car, marry a super spouse, give birth to gifted children, look ten years younger, and let's not stop there; even our pets must be well-adjusted and pedigreed! This kind of pressure can create undue stress and a sense of inadequacy which ultimately hinders instead of helps us achieve success.

When we are striving for perfection in everything we do, we avoid mistakes at all costs. And the only way to avoid mistakes is to take little or no risk. Playing it safe and small blocks our creativity and problem-solving skills. This often leads to procrastination on projects and tasks that are important to us. Procrastination is simply perfectionism in disguise.

If perfectionism doesn't take the form of procrastination, it can often take the form of busy work. We attempt to do it all and all at once. We rush from one task to another, fearing that if we look too closely, we will see all our mistakes. Our only goal is to get things done, so we can move onto the next task. There's little time to consider new approaches, implications or plans that could be more effective.

I've discovered that when we fly around attempting to be "Superwomen" it only makes us super tired, super crabby and super stressed. This kind of stress can lead to diseases of the heart, mind and spirit. It may explain why one in every 2.6 female deaths in the United States is due to heart disease and why women suffer from depression twice as much as men.

After fifteen years of research and speaking on this topic to women across the country, I uncovered a simple, yet powerful solution. At first glance, it may seem to go against everything you've been programmed to believe. Your first thought might be to dismiss it with a swish of your superwoman cape. It certainly goes against the old adage your mother taught you, that practice does indeed make perfect. But I have another adage. One that may seem, well, slightly off, which is why I call it the Slightly Off Solution to Success ®

The answer came to me while writing my weekly humor column. Each week I'd struggle to write the perfect column for my 200,000 newspaper readers. And each week I was wracked with fear and overwhelming feelings of inadequacy, which often lead to procrastination and severe writers block. I had created an impossible scenario in my own mind. If I didn't write an A+ column, then I was a failure. One day, I decided that the only way to finish my work was to give myself permission to write a "C" column - an adequate, competent column, which I knew very well I could accomplish. Suddenly the ideas started to flow faster than I could write them down. Instead of sitting frozen at my computer screen, I was having fun playing with words and phrases and in less time and with less effort, I had finished my column! To my amazement, the permission to earn a "C" had freed me up to do just the opposite! When we take the pressure off ourselves, we reduce our anxiety which in turn opens up our creativity and gives us more confidence and clarity to tackle the task.

Since that first revelation, I have used the "C" theory to my advantage in many other situations. Whenever I begin a new work project, learn a new task, or take on a new adventure, I give myself permission to earn a "C". I recently took a belly dancing class, and I was definitely a C, maybe even a C - But most nights my belly shook more from laughter then from dancing, which reduced my stress and gave me energy for the more demanding jobs in my work and home life.

This Slightly Off Solution works well in another way too. For instance, there are some jobs only worthy of a "C" in the first place. Personally for me, those jobs include house cleaning, laundry, and yard work. I can contentedly vacuum only the center of a room, and mow the lawn without edging!

So, with a wave of my magic wand, I give you permission to earn a "C". Go ahead, try it on for size, you just might find the Slightly Off Solution to success is filled with more joy and laughter and a lot less stress than you ever thought possible.

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Author and popular humor speaker, Deb DiSandro, is the owner of Slightly Off – a company with a big “C” heart and Slightly Off Solutions for work-life balance and succeeding in business. Ideal programs for health and wellness conferences and professional development

http://www.slightlyoff.com